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Man, I have GOT to cut back on the fandom....

No it's no secret that I'm deathly afraid of Spiders. Especially the "Giant House Spider" and the "Wolf Spiders" that we get here in the Northwest.
Google them if you're brave enough (click on images) Ya, those little bastards can RUN!
Anyway, hubby is in bed sleeping and I'm sitting in my room reading porn fandom stuff and out of the corner of my eye I see something black and hairy run past my foot.
I'm thinking to myself "don't look down... do NOT look down"

I look down.

Sitting hext to my foot is the largest fucking house spider I've ever seen IN MY LIFE!

I scream.

Loudly.

I scream again and call for hubby to come. Apparently I screamed "OMG, THERE IS A GIANT HOUSE ELF IN HERE!!! KILL IT, KILL IT!"

Hubby, who is pretty good natured comes to my rescue, laughing pretty hard for someone who has just been woken up by screams.

I'm never going to live this down, am i?

Posted on Dec. 23rd, 2007 at 02:52 am | | Leave a comment | Add to Memories | Tell a Friend

Comments


[info]the_minx_17

*snicker* House Elf? Really too funny.

As to those damn Wolf Spiders - we have them here. And, yeah, those bastards can run.My neighbor actually broke a shingle on his house trying to kill one.
Posted on Dec. 23rd, 2007 12:03 pm (UTC) | | Thread | Reply

[info]magic_helmet

Aren't those bloody wolfies a bane?

They are harmless and all, but dammit, MUST they come in THE HOUSE????
Posted on Dec. 23rd, 2007 08:32 pm (UTC) | | Parent | Thread | Reply

[info]the_minx_17

*snort* Harmless, my ass. I about kill myself trying to get away from them. ;)
Posted on Dec. 24th, 2007 12:49 am (UTC) | | Parent | Thread | Reply

[info]magic_helmet

At least they don't come into the cars like the Australian Huntsman is famous for!
Posted on Dec. 24th, 2007 01:28 am (UTC) | | Parent | Reply

[info]jin_fenghuang

LOL, will let you live that one down? I mean Ever?
Posted on Dec. 23rd, 2007 12:04 pm (UTC) | | Thread | Reply

[info]magic_helmet

Well, it's the morning after and he's razzing me pretty hard.

He came out of the bathroom and told he he'd checked the tub for giant house elfs, but there were none. His sister is on her way over to wrap gifts - I'm SO looking forward to THAT... those two get together and giggle like girls...
Posted on Dec. 23rd, 2007 08:34 pm (UTC) | | Parent | Reply

[info]calanor

ROFLMAO!!!!


OMG.. that's too funny...

well I have one for you... one of my residents was constantly pushing the button to tell me that the light was on.. showing that he had pushed the button.. after what maybe.. 10 trips down the hall to his room... I told the charge nurse I was gonna use his fingers for potion ingredients..

Severus loves me.. :D

Posted on Dec. 23rd, 2007 12:07 pm (UTC) | | Thread | Reply

[info]magic_helmet

Snape or a giant house elf? Which is scarier?

I think perhaps Snape...
Posted on Dec. 23rd, 2007 08:35 pm (UTC) | | Parent | Reply

[info]synn

LOL. I'm surprised he wasn't laughing too hard to help you.

Don't think I've had anything like that, though I did almost sign a work email with -synn the other day.

And then there's the fact that we tease the purebred cats in the house for consorting with the mud-blood moggies...
Posted on Dec. 23rd, 2007 04:36 pm (UTC) | | Thread | Reply

[info]magic_helmet

You consort with mud-blood moggies? Oh the humanity!!!

Yeah, I'm getting razzed pretty bad today...
Posted on Dec. 23rd, 2007 08:36 pm (UTC) | | Parent | Thread | Reply

[info]synn

poor thing. I'm sure it'll calm down eventually, and then someone else in the house will see a spider and the whole thing with start again... : )

We don't mind consorting with mud-blood moggies, it's those pure-bred cats that have issues. Elitists.
Posted on Dec. 23rd, 2007 08:49 pm (UTC) | | Parent | Reply

[info]dixiebell12

It's not poisoness is it? We only have little ones that get inside here. Although we do have black widows outside which are really scary.

Hugs and sends you virual spider(elf) spray,
Dixiebell
Posted on Dec. 23rd, 2007 05:47 pm (UTC) | | Thread | Reply

[info]magic_helmet

Nope, not poisonous. Just really bloody big and really bloody fast! They are hunters so they are often on the move...

Dammit, I just gave myself the heebie jeebies again.
Posted on Dec. 23rd, 2007 08:38 pm (UTC) | | Parent | Reply

[info]accioslash

Perhaps it was a House Elf in Animagus form? ;D

I hate those honkin' huge spiders. I almost picked up the biggest one I've ever seen in my house one time because it was in the laundry room and I thought it was a rolled up sock. That sucker took off but was too big to fit under the woodwork so he is now very, very dead. *shudders*
Posted on Dec. 23rd, 2007 05:50 pm (UTC) | | Thread | Reply

[info]magic_helmet

Oh my shit! I think if I'd seen that, I would've run out of the house and burned it to the ground with everything in it, just to ensure the sucker was dead.

But then again I've seen your house - it's beautiful.

Ok, perhaps burning it down is an exaggeration, but I would've called in the Terminator, and I would've stayed at a hotel until I had proof the sucker was dead.
Posted on Dec. 23rd, 2007 08:39 pm (UTC) | | Parent | Reply

[info]djin7

I name my spiders. Usually the pretty ones - the wood spiders in webs, though I do have a wolf spider somewhere around that I call Boris. My cats play with those, so they don't last long.

*g*
Posted on Dec. 23rd, 2007 06:10 pm (UTC) | | Thread | Reply

[info]magic_helmet

I try to be cool about them, I really do. I'm fine with the ones that spin webs, because I always know where they are.

You're lucky your cats deal with them. I once threw my cat at one that was walking along the floor in the living room. She took one look at it and ran away.

Posted on Dec. 23rd, 2007 08:42 pm (UTC) | | Parent | Reply

[info]amorettea

I killed a black widow that dropped down from the ceiling of the computer room the other day onto the project I was working on. I checked it later to be sure I hadn't panicked and thought it was a black widow when it wasn't. It was. Ick.

No house elves, though. . .
Posted on Dec. 23rd, 2007 07:55 pm (UTC) | | Reply

[info]amorettea

I killed a black widow that dropped down from the ceiling of the computer room the other day onto the project I was working on. I checked it later to be sure I hadn't panicked and thought it was a black widow when it wasn't. It was. Ick.

No house elves, though. . .
Posted on Dec. 23rd, 2007 07:55 pm (UTC) | | Thread | Reply

[info]magic_helmet

We supposedly have those here, but I've only seen one and it was when I was a child.

There is something about black widows that look sinister, isn't there?
Posted on Dec. 23rd, 2007 08:40 pm (UTC) | | Parent | Reply

[info]sweetsorcery

I'm never going to live this down, am i?

It's doubtful. *snicker*
And there's no way I'm googling those. I have pasted extremely fine net curtain fabric to our windows, or I wouldn't open them at all during summer. That's how I feel about wildlife. *shudder*
Posted on Dec. 23rd, 2007 11:16 pm (UTC) | | Thread | Reply

[info]magic_helmet

You know, we have screens over our windows, and the doors, and they STILL get in.

Posted on Dec. 24th, 2007 01:29 am (UTC) | | Parent | Reply

[info]banefire

You're not going to live it down... NEVER!! It'll be recorded as family history by your hubby, and brought up at frequent intervals just to stir you. ;-))

I'm in New Zealand and the Australian House Spider has been "imported?" here. They're big, black and hairy buggers, and BOY!!! Can these buggers run! Also have the occasional White-Tailed spider, but I flatten them. The rest I evict outdoors. Wolf spiders are common here also. Thank God I'm not scared of spiders, but I am terrified of deep large bodies of water. *shudders*
Posted on Dec. 24th, 2007 03:06 am (UTC) | | Thread | Reply

[info]magic_helmet

I used to live in NZ - I'm from there, actually, and I don't ever remember seeing the Aussie House Spider there.

Fucking australia. They send all their nuisances over to NZ don't they - the spiders and the MEN!

Posted on Dec. 24th, 2007 03:08 am (UTC) | | Parent | Thread | Reply

[info]banefire

The Aussie house-spider is thriving quite healthily in NZ. Quite common now. And they still startle me whenever I see this big black hairy leggy thing go darting across the floor. I then have a closer look and yell "Look at the size of this thing! It's HUGE!" Much to the dismay of my brother who is terrified of them. *grins evilly*
Posted on Dec. 24th, 2007 03:53 am (UTC) | | Parent | Thread | Reply

[info]magic_helmet

Bloody fucking hell, is there NO WHERE SAFE from these monsters???

I thought NZ was the last frontier!
Posted on Dec. 24th, 2007 03:54 am (UTC) | | Parent | Reply

[info]snarry_fan7

I'm with you on being terrified of deep large bodies of water. They all freak me out, except for the ocean for some odd reason. Even swimming pools in broad daylight scare me, but only if there's no one else around. Pool drains freak me out too. I think I must have drowned in a past life, lol. I'm fine with spiders though, we have a lot around my house. Cockroaches also make me act like a five year old.~Sophia
Posted on Dec. 24th, 2007 04:53 am (UTC) | | Parent | Thread | Reply

[info]banefire

I can't even stand the ocean. I avoid going to beaches. *shudders* I can swim, but it took the trainers 3 years to get me to learn. I was so terrified of the water. Not so much now, but I still avoid it as much as possible.
Posted on Dec. 24th, 2007 09:50 pm (UTC) | | Parent | Thread | Reply

[info]snarry_fan7

I don't mind swimming, it's just the darkness and my fear of drowning.~Sophia
Posted on Dec. 24th, 2007 11:59 pm (UTC) | | Parent | Reply

[info]whatthefuckbenj

I'm never going to live this down, am i? hehe no you probably won't ;) But at least he did come to your rescue.. Oh and I had a giant spider sitting right over my bed when I was reading HBP.. freaked the shit out of me..
Posted on Dec. 24th, 2007 10:41 pm (UTC) | | Thread | Reply

[info]magic_helmet

See, I live in fear of those rotters running over me in my sleep.

It strikes fear FEAR into my heart. And to be honest with you, that is usually the source of; my stress dreams.

My phobia is bad. Really bad!
Posted on Dec. 24th, 2007 11:32 pm (UTC) | | Parent | Reply